Please help me... I am confused. In work there's a new guy and he's very handsome. He's got the Brad Pitt kind of look and I somehow feel attracted to him. I've never felt like this... What comes to your mind when you see a beautiful young man? I am not gay or anything but I think there is a gay person deep down inside me some where and I don't want to show him to the real world. Please don't laugh and help me with this. I didn't know where else to ask about this, so I just posted it in this forum to stay anonymous.Well, you have to peruse your interests, whatever they may be. I've had a girlfriend who thought of herself as bisexual, yet refused to try dating a girl, and a girlfriend who is currently dating and sexually active with another woman, yet refuses to think of herself as bisexual.People get hung up over the words and the identities too much. You should be honest with yourself and do what you want to do. I have no idea what the tolerance level in Qatar is like, so maybe it's socially riskier than it would be in the USA.Quote:Originally Posted by IrrenefugPlease help me... I am confused. In work there's a new guy and he's very handsome. He's got the Brad Pitt kind of look and I somehow feel attracted to him. I've never felt like this... What comes to your mind when you see a beautiful young man? I am not gay or anything but I think there is a gay person deep down inside me some where and I don't want to show him to the real world. Please don't laugh and help me with this. I didn't know where else to ask about this, so I just posted it in this forum to stay anonymous.simply try it and make your choice :)First of all, can you imagine yourself having sex with him or rather love him with your heart? Have you ever fantasized about him while showering or in bed?For me, sex is what turns me on, especially when sex looks good. The Greeks had young nude males in tip-top shape playing the Games. (also plenty of statues!) In a sense, that's attractive because it's the human body in its best form -something to be admired, even attracted to.lust is where it begins to differ though! i may be able to say "that's an attractive sorta guy" but i personally wouldn't try to hook up with him!hope that helps!I'm not sure how universal this idea is, but in the States there's a term called a "man-crush" (though, the term may differ depending on what part of the country you're from). Sometimes a guy meets another guy who is, quite simply, THE COOLEST!The person then spends a great deal of time hanging out with this person and talking to their friends about how awesome he is. But it's totally non-sexual.What I'm getting at is pretty close to what ibarrz is saying, really examine your feelings and decide if you're thinking "This guy is hot. We should have sexy time" or "This guy is awesome. We should play ultimate frisbee together."Just be honest with yourself about it. Like mister_playboy, I also don't know what social tolerance levels are like where you live, but, even if you can't be as open about it with your peers, you shouldn't have to lie to yourself.???????Is anyone answering this thread gay? Has anyone here had to deal with a "mancrush" before? ( I liked how you used that term lowleg).Come on people, I love discussion threads as much as anyone here but what this guy could use is some advice from someone who has deal with this before, (or this is is just a bullshit thread, we get those too).Have I ever dealt with anything similar? maybe I have. I mean how big of an age difference are we talking about here? The older I have become the more I find myself appreciating beauty in places and people that I had not noticed when I was younger. That includes people of the same sex. But this being someone you work with? and no one thinks you are gay and you do not know if he is? (you actually did not mention his sexual preference). You have to take a look at the bigger picture here. Any confrontation here could lead to disastrous results. There is nothing wrong with fantasizing, ( ibarzz you are such a freak, I like that). We have to think of the consequences when we attempt to make fantasies a reality. There is a big difference between "jacking off" to Brad Pitt and asking him out to dinner and a movie. So do not feel guilty about how you feel but think before you act.i also need help. here goes, how come i fantasize about kissing guys, sometimes very rarely, but yet have no sexual interest in them?, I'm not even a little bit turned on by men naked bodies. in fact i see their bodies as sort of like a train wreck lol, but yet like i said, i fantasize about kissing them. what do you call that?.Quote:Originally Posted by spikey1212i also need help. here goes, how come i fantasize about kissing guys, sometimes very rarely, but yet have no sexual interest in them?, I'm not even a little bit turned on by men naked bodies. in fact i see their bodies as sort of like a train wreck lol, but yet like i said, i fantasize about kissing them. what do you call that?.Affectionate.No, really. Kissing is a very affectionate gesture between two people. It is not something you feel is appropriate to act on so you only fantasize about it. No big deal. Fantasies are very private and personal things. They do not have to fit anyone elses rules or boundaries.Quote:Originally Posted by CeewanKissing is a very affectionate gesture between two peopleIn some cultures men can kiss. In some cultures men hold hands. Like Ceewan said, Its just a sign of affection and not necessarily anything more.Typically, I would think that if a person has to ask, "I thought/said/did such and such, does that mean I'm gay?" you're probably not gay. Unless the question is something like, "I regularly have sex exclusively with men and enjoy it, does that mean I'm gay?", then, yes, thats a pretty clear sign you're gay.Quote:Originally Posted by spikey1212i also need help. here goes, how come i fantasize about kissing guys, sometimes very rarely, but yet have no sexual interest in them?, I'm not even a little bit turned on by men naked bodies...what do you call that?.I'd call it a passing thought and, at the most, just a fantasy. Look at it this way, does speaking/thinking in Korean make a person Korean? No, BEING Korean makes them Korean. Just the same, you have to BE gay. Its not a bug you catch and wake up the next day saying, "whoops, I caught teh gayzorz!"To be gay, you have to have no interest in women. To be bi, you have to have sexual interest in men and women. If you're only attracted to women, in this case, we'll call that "being spikey1212."Quote:Originally Posted by spikey1212in fact i see their bodies as sort of like a train wreck lolAh, the utilitarian male physique. I can't remember the exact quote, but I think it was 'Seinfeld' where they said something akin to: "The male body is not meant to be beautiful, its meant to be functional. Like a Jeep."